BAYANI & I: EPIC FAIL

(i-click ang piktyur para jumambo)


Sabi ni Bayani "BF" Fernando, "Marikina: Singapore ng Asia"

Ang tanong ko naman, "Di ba ang Singapore ng Asia... ay Singapore?"

This is a photo of a "Bayani for President Movement" newsletter entitled "Tinig ng mga Bayani". This was distributed to the people of Tondo early this morning. I have nothing against this kind of marketing strategy pero please naman, kung hindi ninyo kaya kumuha ng magaling na newsletter editor, kumuha naman kayo ng writer na may common sense.

If this blundder is what they call "Ang Alamat ni Bayani", anak ng mga gahiganteng janitor fish sa Marikina River! ito ay isang: (with a big big voice)... EPIC FAIL!!!



...tapos... pagkatapos nun...



Patutsada ko kay BF, "Sibakin mo nga yung project head ng newsletter mo. Siguradong nangick-back yan sa budget. Biruin mo ba naman ang kunin na writer eh lasinggero, "Fundador Soriano". Pangalan na pangalan palang, tomador na."

Sagot naman ni BF, "Alam mo mehn, ang CORNY mo! At blunder yun, hindi blundder. Mali spelling mo, tanga!"

MY CONTRIBUTION TO THE 2010 ELECTIONS

People, amoy pera na naman ang simoy ng hangin, this means only one thing: malapit na ang ating much awaited event every 6 years, ang Philippine Presidential Elections! Ever since I started writing political commentaries on the web, lagi kong inaadvocate exercise of our right to vote (ano ba yung isang high-polluting word na laging sinasabi ni Rep. Locsin, saperage?)

As a contribution to this upcoming 2010 elections, I decided to write a series of blogs highlighting the recent small booboos of our kagalang-galangs. Sabihin siguro ng iba, "Maninira ka lang ng kandidato, wala ka naman maitutulong talaga" Sagot ko diyan, I beg to disagree. Kung maiha-highlight ko ang mga ito, lets just say, na ang mga ito ay magiging makabago at kakaibang pananaw kung paano dapat natin tignan ang elections at ang mga ways kung paano magpaandar ng campain ang ating mga presidential hopefuls.

Magiging mukha lang siyang joke-time, pero pickapin naman ninyo yung kahit na katiting na kabutihan na makukuha ninyo sa mga isusulat ko sa susunod na mga araw.

Ang title ng series na ito ay "(insert name of presidentiable) & ME: EPIC FAIL"

So ano, simulan na natin!:

PGMA: I WANT A "D" CUP

This news, or I should say rumor, should be nothing new to me but because it involves my president, your president, our Beloved President GMA it came as a big shock. A friend told me that she read an article on the Manila Bulletin that PGMA had a boob job!

Friend: mehn, don't you ever wonder why GMA's breasts are that luscious?
Pansitlove: wtf! potah naman chong, pati ba naman si Gloria pinagnanasaan mo?
Friend: no mehn, those tits don't look like granny tits to me! Hahaha!
Pansitlove: potah! ano toh? meron din silang sex video ni Hayden Kho?
Friend: deins mehn, nabasa ko lang sa dyaryo na nagparetoke ng boobs si madam. Hahaha!

According to the article, Mrs. Arroyo underwent removal and replacement of breast silicone implants. Padeny-deny pa sila Sec Cerge. Akala ba ninyo mga artista lang ang tinatamaan ng pagiging banidosa, quarantine ninyo mukha niyo!

Dagdag pa sa article, na a lump in the groin area was also scheduled to be removed by surgery. At nagpabiopsy din si Madame on her breast, sa awa ng kung sino mang lumikha kay PGMA, wala naman talaga siyang sakit.

Yes people! Science is the reason why our beloved President has a perky set of barking puppies. If only she'd agree to blow those tities up to size D, I'm certain that she'll have a buzzling career other than in politics. I'm sure porn has a market for pseudo-presidents. Hahaha!

(hindi na makapagpigil si FG)

(Kung magkataoon, sasakit lalo ang ulo ni Edu Manzano niyan. Quiapo people, make room for PGMA!)